Who says Failure is for loooosers? - Part I

Failure....such a negative word isn't it? Funny part - every single person has to go through it some time. But it is just the way you look at it. There are thousand of examples when someone faced this great difficulty in life and came out stronger. I haven't yet completely surmounted all my challenges but I guess somewhere in the middle! So here is my story so far -

Well where should I begin....hmmm....lets begin from the end of engineering. After a gruesome 4 years, those who have faced it with me will vouch for it; I started my career in Wipro Technologies, one of the success stories of the Indian IT services sector. Extremely elated I took those first steps and joining the organization. Pretty soon I realized that this was not what I was looking for. So began the hunt. Like many of my peers the lure of MBA, caught me. I got myself transfered to Pune so that work would be slightly less and I could prepare for CAT. Pune was a great experience, I made very close new friends and re-forged the friendship with many. It was an experience worth cherishing. Most of my roommates were also preparing for CAT, hence it was a complete college environment, in office and outside.

After preparing extremely hard and hoping for a good result I looked forward to the exam day. Alas, I fell very sick 2 days before the exam. The real blow came when the doctor said forget about your exam, give it next year. 6 months of hard work just eroded! Against his advice I did go the examination center only concentrate for half the duration, then started nausea, etc. So ended the CAT saga. Bitter end, failure, despair. Followed up the slew of other entrance tests with half hearted attempts at best.

Frankly after the outcome I was in no mood to sit and prepare for CAT again. Instead I set out earn my MBA from a US university. This first meant I had to prepare for GMAT. Somehow the cobwebs of CAT and various exams given before, I wasn't confident and just wanted to get this right once and for all. I started the prep, but soon hit a road block. In the mean time I transferred back to Bangalore. I joined a class for some professional help I started the prep in earnest. With a help from a friend I scored decent. Now began the hard part - Applications!

By no stretch of imagination it is simple. It is one of the hardest parts of the entire process. There are numerous blogs just devoted to it. Anyway, I aimed high, saddled and sent out applications to the best schools. I knew it was going to be very tough and in cognizance completed the applications, which gave so many sleep less nights! I mean you are asked to tell your past, present and what you see in future! Are they looking for students or crystal balls!!!!

Well, soon enough I got an interview call from one of the universities. Happy and confident, I felt I aced it. It was great, and I was hopeful to get many more calls. In the mean time a got a couple of rejects, ppsssst....I kept on with my application schedule. Then the long wait. One by one rejects kept pouring in. The number finally reached a whopping 12. 12 rejects! Completely damned, dejected and de-motivated.

No clue of what to make out of it and what to do next. I kept talking to people, some said less experience, some say weak profile. What ever the reason I got screwed! Someone put it to me as, may be this is the preparation for something. There a lot of things left to be accomplished and may be God is preparing me it. Felt good. Few days passed by, but then again I was scratching my head; what do I do now. Job hunt not going great, the timing of the recession not helping a bit. But I guess I have to just stick to a plan.

One thing is clear it is not simple, it is hard. Imagine it to be very hard and it is harder still. But this is life - meant to be hard ;). But I learnt a lot in the process and surprising I learnt a lot about myself. What I really want to do etc.

Still hoping for the best I move on. Preparing for the next round. People say success is sweet, failure is bitter, but is it? Failure to me has nothing in it. No odor, color or taste! Nobody wants it. And once it is over you don't want to think about it, forget the taste. But Failure gives success its sweetness. There will be no joy in success if not failed attempting it. I haven't yet tasted the sweetness of success but hope to soon. Part II of this blog when it happens!

I'll end by this: "If a paper flies it is by luck, but a bird flies by effort...." Tried to be the paper (failed there), now trying to be the bird!!!